Inside Pulse 12

Staff Bio: Week 2 – Bebito Jackson

Greetings! I’m Bebito Jackson, Director of Marketing & Public Relations here at Gamefan. It’s my job to pick up the pieces after the staff inevitably alienates companies due to honestly reviewing games or by prank emailing them or by saying or doing something stupid in general. I also write and help out with a variety of projects. Everyone on staff loves and respects me and those that didn’t Alex have already fired. I’m the greatest, sexiest, most endowed, most intelligent and humblest member of the staff. Come. Get to know why I’m so awesome.

BebitoMediumName: Bebito Jackson

Nicknames: Big Daddy Cool, Bebs, Bobby Blaze, Lovable Retard

Location: Southern New Jersey

Three Favorite Genres:
Platformers
RPGs
Action Adventure

Three Favorite Games:
Shining Force II (Sega Genesis)
Panzer Dragoon Saga (Sega Saturn)
The Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker (Nintendo GameCube)

Favorite Console: Sega Saturn (it JUST edges out Dreamcast)

Other Places Their Writing Can Be Found:
Gaming Infinity
SegaDCPower
411mania
Inside Pulse

Bio: Bebito Jackson is a devoted Sega fan that is unhealthy obsessed with Sonic the Hedgehog. He has worked in video game journalism since 1999 and has worked as both Editor in Chief and Director of Marketing & Public Relations for the gaming divisions of 411mania.com and Inside Pulse. Bebito has been playing games since he knew how to go potty. He loves older consoles dating back to who knows when and boots them up every so often; even his Commodore 64. Despite the fact he’s a little bit jaded do not mistake him for those overly bitter gamers who think everything retro rules and everything released today sucks. He is content to sift through the crap of all generations finding gamings’ gems and falling in love with each and every one of them with the same passion. He’s wacky. He makes many misguided attempts at humor. He owns a fictional pet named the Rumor Monkey. And he’s a long time fan of the original Diehard Gamefan.

Q&A

1. – Alex Lucard: How is it you stay so loyal to Sega after they’ve raped and desecrated so many of your most beloved of franchises (Sonic/Shining Force/etc)?

Well, most consider the downfall of Sega to be when Sammy starting buying into the company during August 2003. So, let’s see how many quote unquote good games Sega has released since then up to the date of the re-launch of Diehard Gamefan. This list is based solely off data taken from GameRankings.com that show a game’s average review percentage as 80% or above. I have a problem in general with the review scale the industry uses to score games (7 out of a range of 1-10 is average? Really? Coulda sworn basic math told me that would be a 5). But it’s the tool we have so we’ll use it here:

Virtua Fighter 5 Online 10/30/2007 X360 89.8%
Sonic Rush Adventure 9/18/2007 DS 80.0%
Virtua Tennis 3 3/20/2007 X360 80.4%
Condemned 11/16/2005 X360 82.4%
Sonic Rush 11/15/2005 DS 83.0%
Gunstar Super Heroes 10/25/2005 GBA 82.8%
NHL: Eastside Hockey Manager 2005 PC 82.1%
Rome: Total War Barbarian Invasion PC 82.5%
Phantasy Star Online: Blue Burst PC 81.0%
Worldwide Soccer Manager 2006 PC 89.2%
Sonic Adv. & Sonic Pinball Combo Pack GBA 80.0%
OutRun 2006: Coast 2 Coast PSP 82.7%
Total War: Eras 8/1/2006 PC 88.3%
NHL: Eastside Hockey Manager 2007 PC 88.8%
Medieval II: Total War PC 87.5%
Sega Genesis Collection PS2 81.1%
Worldwide Soccer Manager 2007 PC 86.1%
Worldwide Soccer Manager 2008 PC 84.1%
Virtua Tennis: World Tour PSP 86.0%
Super Monkey Ball Deluxe 3/15/2005 XBOX 80.6%
Worldwide Soccer Manager 2005 PC 88.7%
ESPN College Hoops 2K5 11/17/2004 XBOX 86.5%
Otogi 2: Immortal Warriors 10/21/2004 XBOX 80.9%
ESPN NBA 2K5 9/28/2004 XBOX 84.5%
ESPN NHL 2K5 8/30/2004 XBOX 86.3%
Astro Boy: Omega Factor 8/18/2004 GBA 86.4%
ESPN NFL 2K5 7/20/2004 XBOX 90.2%
ESPN NBA Basketball 10/22/2003 XBOX 86.2%
ESPN NFL Football 9/3/2003 XBOX 89.5%
Otogi: Myth of Demons 8/27/2003 XBOX 82.0%
Virtua Fighter 4: Evolution 8/13/2003 PS2 91.7%

Notable standout titles for me personally include: Virtua Fighter 4. Astro Boy: Omega Factor. Virtua Tennis 3. OutRun 2006. The entire 2K series. Gunstar Super Heroes. Sonic Rush. Sonic Rush Adventure. Virtua Fighter 5 Online. And a few others that aren’t even on that list such as The Rub Rabbits.

Point #1 – Sega still releases good games. Are they as outstanding and innovative and revolutionary as they used to be? No. It’s a lot more PC-based titles now and many of the games Sega simply publishes rather than develops. Yet and still, they continue churning out the goodness. Around 7-10 games a year’s worth.

Point#2 – Yup. No getting around it. Today’s Sega has raped and desecrated many of my most beloved of franchises including Sonic and the Shining Force series among others. 2D Sonics? Still the bread and butter. But games like Shadow the Hedgehog have all but destroyed the series. And I don’t even want to talk about the Shining Force Neo games. They are not the same company they used to be and the growing pains of shifting to a solely software manufacturer have been brutal. So why am I still a Sega fan? Because my Saturn’s still hooked up in my game room with an import copy of X-Men Vs. Street Fighter in it. Because my Dreamcast is still spinning Soul Calibur, Sega Rally 2, Street Fighter III: Third Strike and Virtual On (VOOT). Because I still retrogame Sega Genesis titles and love them.

You see… I’m still a Sega fan because of the fact that they had a history to desecrate in the first place. I’m a fan of their past. Sega/Sammy? Eh, they’re ok. But I’m a fan of plain old Sega. The fact that Shining Force Neo makes me want to throw bleach in my eyes does not change the fact that Shining Force II is one of my favorite games of all-time. Sega’s games have been brilliant for decades and just because many of the new ones aren’t any where near touching the old, does not change the fact that the old exist. It does not change the awesomeness of their previous games. And is the old Sega completely dead? Games like Sonic Rush, Gunstar Super Heroes, and Virtua Fighter 5 show glimmers of the Sega I love so much. But even if they never released another competent game ever again. Even if they stopped making games altogether. I will still remember and honor what Sega has done for videogaming since before the 1980s.

So yeah… SAY IT… SAY IT…

2. – Bryan Berg: OK. What’s the story behind the Rumor Monkey? What was the inspiration behind his creation?

Back in 2002 to 2004 I used to write a weekly gaming gossip column entitled The Rumor Down-Lo. It was a straight to the point news piece at first but as things went on I added a ton of unneeded material that became haven for the silly, retarded, and ridiculous until the rumors portion of it became secondary. Even then I wanted to corrupt the actual gossip section with some form of steady stupidity and thus was born the Rumor Monkey. Whenever I needed “top, TOP secret information” my “monkey” was the only one able to sneak behind the scenes and bring me back the dirt. He was created on a whim and never meant to be recurring but the readers latched onto him and I still hear mentions of him from people even now though I stopped writing that series many years ago. To this day I don’t understand it. So I still “keep” him around.

Besides, monkeys are awesome. And this is the closest I’ll ever come to having a monkey butler.

3. – Lee Baxley: So just how hot IS your wife? Feel free to provide a picture.

Ah. Another stand-by of The Rumor Down-Lo. I used to shove it in everyone’s face just how hot my wife, Bella, is. And fo’ real? She’s smokin’.

For years now readers have been asking for the same thing. One email I got said:

“dear bebooto,
You’ve got my favorite column on 411 Games. The Spotlight thing is a nice little touch. Please post pictures of your HOT wife while she’s just getting out of the shower, being spanked with a leather belt.”

My audience was awesome.

Bella doesn’t want her face floating around the internets with or without spanking leather belts. I asked. No go. But if I was to describe her, I’d say imagine an Italian girl with the face similar of Angelina Jolie, the boobs of… um, somebody with huge boobs, the mid-section and bottom of Jennifer Lopez, and the rest on down the legs is Stacy Kiebler. That’s how I see her anyway. Yup. I did pretty well.

4. – Guy Desmarais: Let’s say Sega came to you and asked you to make a roster for their upcoming game “Sega Smash Brothers”, which characters would you put in that fighting game? Please state your reason for each one. It can be as much as 40 characters and as little as 10.

Sonic The Hedgehog (from Sonic The Hedgehog – Sega Genesis 1991)
– Leaving out Sonic in a Sega universe fighting game would be akin to leaving Mario out of Super Smash Bro. He’s Sega’s mascot. He’s an industry icon. And he’s most likely to kick everyone else’s ass.

Akira Yuki (from Virtua Fighter – Arcade 1993)
– Like Sonic, iconic. There are a dozen other characters I’d rather have here, but this is from Sega’s premier fighting franchise. He kicked off the first 3D fighter ever made. It’d be retarded to leave him out of the main roster.

NiGHTS (from NiGHTS Into Dreams – Sega Saturn 1996)
– Again, icon. Even though he’s been misused lately, NiGHTS still was in what is considered one of the greatest games of all-time. For many fans when you say Sega they think of NiGHTS as quickly as they do Sonic.

Shinobi (from Shinobi – Arcade 1987)
– Do I really even have to justify this? It’s Shinobi! Sega’s defining ninja! Truthfully, a ninja should be in every fighting game. Even robot fighters. Omg!! Ninja Fighting Robots! How cool is that??? I’m sorry, I’ll shut up now…

ToeJam (from ToeJam & Earl – Sega Genesis 1991)
– He’s a skinny three-legged red alien with snail-like eyes, who wears a backwards white hat, black and white Converse sneakers, an oversized golden medallion, and is from the planet Funkotron. Nuff’ said.

Ulala (from Space Channel 5 – Sega Dreamcast 1996)
– The dancing, alien busting, female reporter. Her cool design, off the wall game concept, and overall uniqueness makes her a perfect fit. Plus hey, we need somebody to keep ToeJam in check in right?

Alex Kidd (from Alex Kidd in Miracle World – Sega Master System 1986)
– Sega’s mascot before Sega had mascots. Kidd had a platformer so remarkable it rivaled the original Super Mario Bro. Sadly it was on the Sega Master System so no one noticed. But that alone validates his awesomeness and spot on the roster.

Fei Yen (from Virtual On: Cypher Troopers – Arcade 1995)
– I love Virtual On. She’s my favorite Virtualoid. I get to have one personal bit of fan service with all this and this is it. I will play her. I will enjoy her. I will decimate everyone with her.

Zaxxon (from Zaxxon – Arcade 1982)
– Never heard of him? He’s the monster robot killing machine! Zaxxon’s game is unique as it’s the first to employ isometric projection, (three-quarter viewing perspective) simulating 3D. This pays homage to Sega’s innovation and to their first arcade games.

Max (from Shining Force – Sega Genesis 1993)
– Why? Because he’s from the original Shining Force. Back when the words Shining Force meant something. Back when Shining Force was incredible. The Shining series needs representation and it was Max who kicked off all the tactics nirvana.

There. Those are my main roster. As unlockables I would have the monkey from Samba De Amigo. Tails from Sonic The Hedgehog 2. Knuckles from Sonic & Knuckles. Gilius Thunderhead, the battle axe-wielding dwarf from Golden Axe. Gunstar Red from Gunstar Heroes. Beat from Jet Set Radio. Nei from Phantasy Star II. The Daytona USA car. Opa-Opa from Fantasy Zone. Slade, the wererat ninja thief from Shining Force II. Leon from Beyond Oasis. Shinguji Sakura from Sakura Taisen. Blaze Fielding, the hot chick from Streets of Rage. Candy, the hot dominatrix chick from Fighting Vipers. Wein of Highland, the pretty boy blonde guy from Dragon Force. Vectorman. The Golden Undead Warrior from Guardian Heroes. The Dragon from Panzer Dragoon. Shou Amabane from Burning Rangers. Ryo Hazuki from Shenmue. A giant VMU. And Wonderboy! Now go ahead. Try and tell me you WOULDN’T buy that.

5. – Mark B.: Rank, in order of awesomeness, the seven game platforms Sega has directly manufactured in the US, and name the best game on each.

1. Sega Saturn – Panzer Dragoon Saga
2. Sega Dreamcast – Soul Calibur
3. Sega Genesis – Shining Force II
4. Sega CD – Shining Force CD
5. Sega Master System – Alex Kidd: in Miracle World
6. Sega Game Gear – Sonic the Hedgehog Triple Trouble
7. Sega 32X – Mortal Kombat II

6. – Charlie Marsh: Which would you rather have, a new Vectorman game, a new Alex Kidd game, or a new Sonic game that’s actually good?

Ugh, after some thought this was really hard. Not because of Vectorman. Screw him. But a new Alex Kidd? Tremendous. But as much as I want to go with Kidd, I have to say new Sonic game. I have fond memories of Kidd but even fonder of Sonic. However the key here is that it must be a GOOD Sonic game. Give me a next-gen Sonic with 3D graphics and 2D gameplay and I will die happy.

7. – Misha: After a Damascene Conversion, you start up the Church Of Sega. What are your Ten Commandments?

There is only ONE commandment. Thou shall release the Shining Force III Trilogy in ENGLISH. It doesn’t matter on what system. I’ve still got my Saturn. Or you can remake it for the PS3 or the 360. Whatever. Just do it Sega. Do it, do it, do it, do it, do it. If this happens all sins of everyone on Earth are forgiven forever.

8. – Dave O.: Is Barrett from FFVII your cousin?

Ah. Because I’m black, right? I’d be offended if it wasn’t in fact true.

9. – ML Kennedy: I’ve honed the ability to accurately predict which game is being played by a group of people by means of listening to their screams of frustration. [e.g. “I was winning the whole damn time! Fucking so unfair” = a Mario Kart game (depending on tone, naturally)].

Which skills, tangentially related to video games, have you been able to develop?

I am able to use CHAOS CONTROL.

10. Frederick Badlissi: Do you have any notable fond memories of gaming allusions in pop music (read: any artist you can think of) at all? Like, perhaps for instance, Del the Funky Homosapien’s “Proto Culture?”

“Super Nintendo, Sega Genesis. When I was dead broke man I couldn’t picture this.”
– Notorious B.I.G.


“Special” Staff Testimonials

When questioned the staff gave the following thoughts and true to life experiences of their life and times with the incomparable Bebito Jackson:

Geli Warner

Bebito’s so awesome that when he plays the Oregon Trail cholera gains him five days.

Guy Desmarais

Bebito played Super Mario Bros., got into the Minus World, and then found the exit. His NES wanted to explode because of this aberration, but Bebito wouldn’t let it. He carried on playing.

Bebito is so tough that when he plays, it’s Frogger that crushes the trucks.

When Bebito plays Mega Man, the bosses die on the first shot fired, no matter what weapon he uses.

Fuck the 3-hearts challenge. Bebito can finish the original Legend of Zelda with two hearts.

Nobody is sure how he does it, but when Bebito plays Tetris, he doesn’t even need to touch the controller and the pieces fall perfectly aligned, line after line.

Most had to wait until Super Smash Bros Brawl to play as Sonic. Not Bebito. He has been playing as Sonic since the first game back on the N64.

You think you were good at NFL2K1? Think again, because Bebito once won the Super Bowl with the Florida Panthers. No, it’s not a typo.

Bebito has seen Chun-Li naked. In game.

In Fire Emblem, once a character dies, it doesn’t come back. Not when Bebito plays, because he is the one who decides if you live or you die.

Bebito can use the Konami Code in games made by Capcom. And it works.

Bebito finished all four Call of Duty games without being shot once. Nobody is stupid enough to shoot him.

Mark B.

Bebito always wins at Doctor Mario; the germs bump into each other so they don’t have to face his wrath.

Bebito never got into Mortal Kombat at all. Every time he played, instead of fighting him, his opponents always killed themselves.

Michael Oreilly

Bebito is so awesome that the single greatest moment of Bebito’s life is EVERY moment of Bebito’s life.

Charlie Marsh

Bebito can play as Mega Man X in the original Mega Man.

Bebito’s SNES plays Genesis games.

Bebito once had a conversation with Link. Link was heard to say “Well excuuuuuuuuuuse me Bebito!” No one knows what happened next, but Link hasn’t spoken since.

Matt Yaeger

When Bebito logs onto Xbox Live, the servers shut down in fear of his awesomeness.

Misha

Bebito always plays his video games. Even in Soviet Russia

Bebito never uses cheats – Games rewrite themselves to make his life easier

Payback is a bitch… Bebito’s bitch