The Daily Pulse 09.06.04

Okay, I have had a rather spastic weekend so I’m going to do a few quick news bites rather than one big article.


Holy crap what a week for games. Phantom Brave, Street Fighter Anniversary Collection, and Star Ocean 3 all came out last week. Personally, I wouldn’t touch the Star Ocean series at all, but I love Phantom Brave and the review of it will be up this week along with my review of Pokemon Fire Red/Leaf Green. You may also see a review of Silent Hill 4 from me to boot! Is this week insane or what?

But then Labour Day week has always been a time for big sales, so why not a week of big games? Look at what all we have this week.

Burnout 3
DragonBall GT GBA
Guilty Gear XX Reloaded
Pokemon Leaf Green/Fire Red
Silent Hill 4
Street Fighter Sega Saturn style joysticks for the PS2.

All of these are going to be major sellers. I do want to touch on the fact we have Street Fighter Joysticks coming out for the PS2 in the style of old Sega Saturn Controllers. More proof that the Sega Saturn was the most under-rated system of all time. It had the best games and the best f*cking joystick in the history of gaming. I’m buying one just so I don’t have to put up with the crap layout that is the PS2 Dual Shock joystick. And if they did this for the Cube and Xbox, I would be even happier.

But next week is a major week for gaming too. From 9-12 to 9-18 look at the other games we have coming out:

Advance Guardian Heroes
Bubble Bobble GBA
Demon Stone
Dragon Ball Z: Buu’s Fury
Gradius V
Gungrave: Overdose
Syberia 2

MY god! Another week of games that should sell like hotcakes. Septemember is shaping up to be one of the best years ever for gaming. That week I have Fable and Guardian Heroes to review for 411. And Maybe Gradius V. But oh oh, there’s more! From 9-19 to 9-25 we have:

Blood Will Tell.
DDR Extreme
Def Jam: Fight for New York
Final Fantasy XI: Retarded online expansion for gamers that suck
F-Zero: GP Legend
Katamari Damashi
Mega Man Command Mission
NHL 2005
Second Sight
Star Wars Trilogy
Tiger Woods PGA Tour 2005
X-Men Legends

That week I have Second Sight and that’s it to review! Thank Christ. 6 reviews in 3 weeks. Kill my social life will you? As I said earlier, September 2004 is proving to be one of the biggest months in the history of gaming. But notice how this month, how many super big name games are multiplatform games. In the days of yore, games that weren’t exclusive to one console tended to suck. Now? Those are the biggest releases. Isn’t it weird how things have changed?

The big question is, how many of these games will live up to their hype. And how many will suck royally. I am nervous as all get out in regards to Guardian Heroes. It’s my favorite Sega Saturn title. Hell, it’s quite possibly my favorite game ever. Will the sequel go the way of greatness like Shining Force Redux did. Or will it make me cry like River City Ransom EX? A fortnight from now we’ll know. And hey, if it’s great, the triad of Pokemon FR/LG, Shining Force: RDD, and Advance Guardian Heros makes the GBA the system to own for 2004. Remember that.

Guys in Games Worth Reading

Misha continues to do a stand up job reporting from the United Kingdom’s equiv to our E3, the ECTS. He covers everything from odd controllers to doing an interview with the Legend of MIR team

The Tribunal debuts as Myself, Alex Williams, Eric S, and the last appearance of Lee Baxley tackle Doom 3. You can also see my full review of Doom 3 Here

COMICS has a special guest writer there today. ME! For those of you that have missed out on this wacky web comic, it is about an interdimensional Supervillain and his talking monkey henchman who are absolutely bad at well, being absolutely bad. They were banished to our dimension and the Dark Overlord has taken a job editing a comics website. It’s very surreal and it was a lot of fun to work with Daron and the gang. The final part of this storyline debuts next week, and of course I’ll be pimping out the link then as well.

144anima is of course an offshoot from the Nexus gang here at Inside Pulse back in the days when both the Kliq and the Nexus were part of It’s written, drawn, coloured, and lettered by the Nexus staff, so if you’re a fan of the IP comics gang, you owe it to yourself to take a look at

On another comic related note, you’ll notice there’s a mention of Topato Potato and Sheriff Pony in the strip. If you’re not familiar with these characters, then SHAME ON YOU. They are characters from the best web comic on the net, WIGU. I can’t describe to you how addicted I am to Wigu. I own two different Topato “I am made of POISON” T-shirts, both books and Jeff even drew me a personalized picture of Pikachu vs Topato while you Wigu looks on in horror at the battle.

Wigu is the tale of the Tinkle Family. There’s young Wigu, a boy with a heart full of adventure and joy. There is Paisley, the brooding goth chick, but don’t call her that. She’s a Nihilist! There’s Roma, the workaholic mom that’s like Alex Keaton from Family Ties. Except with boobs and skunk hair instead of that whole Parkinson’s dealie. And there’s Quincy, the father. He makes a living by writing music to Porn flicks.

And of course there is Princess Dongle and my absolute favorites Sheriff Pony and Topato. You need to read WIGU. It’s better than Something Positive, Elf Only Inn, The Devil’s Panties, Goats, hell, even Penny Arcade. It’s surreal-alicious. Read it or your parents will get scurvy. Do you want them to get scurvy? Of course not. You are not bad children. Only you can save your parents from Scurvy. And in order to do that, you must read WIGU.

And Jeff recently lost his job because you can’t keep your hands off your genitals at night where you’re in bed under the covers where you think no one can see you. BUT THEY CAN! EVERYONE CAN. And now Jeff doesn’t have a job. So go buy TOPATO merchandise. Or else, remember that Scurvy thing? Yeah. You don’t want none.

Oh, and in the last panel of, notice Dark Overlord’s slippers.

Guys in comics worth reading

The Roundtable features a good portion of the Nexus staff deliberating on the top issues in their respective brand of pop culture. Give them a look see!

Chris “You thought Eric’s last name was weird” Delloiacono goes retro with a character I used to love as a kid: DEADMAN.


Well, considering I have no real Music news, except to say LISTEN TO THESE GUYS, I should just get on with the links.

Oh wait. Yes. I do have something to say. Why does the MN state fair have a Jamaican or African band at damn near every exhibit or bazaar?

Okay. It wasn’t that great of a thing to say. But then, for me, it’s been a pretty quiet week music front and anything I would say would involve pimping out websites like My favorite Russian based MP3 downloading website where thanks to how terrible the Russian Economy is, you can get songs not for 99 cents like at Apple or various other US sites, but for 5 to 10 cents a piece! God bless the horror that is the Russian Economy!

And yes I know about the terrible awful disgustingly depraved events that unfolded in the former Soviet Union this week that serve only to remind us that humanity is little better than animals. We just happen to be animals with guns and nukes and the ability to be disgusted by the actions of a small but sadly very vocal minority of psychopaths. And it’s not my job to do social/political commentary on all the things that are wrong with the world. It’s my job to see how many times I can say “Pikachu” over and over again before you people stop finding it cute and amusing.

Guys in Music worth Reading

Like Comic’s Roundtable,’s Music section had a ROCKTABLE where various writers commented on the current news in the music industry. And guess who did a guest appearance there too? YES! Lucard is everywhere! I’m the Triple H of Insidepulse! Oh wait no… I’m that other guy. No really. I’m that OTHER GUY. ;-)

Figures, Sports, and Wrestling

I don’t really have any interest in any of these three topics, but here are some links to some of the better pieces we have over there this week (Yes, I read all of IP. I like to learn new things even if they don’t hold my interest. New things are good for you.)

PK gives us a look at some new Street Fighter figures. Everyone knows I loves me some sweet sweet Sagat action!

Kaye brings us all things Transformery. America Beast Wars toys suck. Japanese Beast Wars Neo toys however RULED!

Eric S needs to switch from reviewing wrestling to say…Laughalympics or whatever that cartoon by Hanna-Barbara was called in the 1970’s. Just to see him have to type Hong Kong Fooey and debate whether or not he really was “The #1 Super Guy.”

Laflin talks about sports.


I actually made Hobo Chicken Chili (sorry no necks) and Pumpkin-Cream Cheese coffee cake muffins for a dinner party tonight. I considered posting those recipes, but felt that was a copout. Instead, as it’s Labour Day weekend and thus a time for relaxing, I decided to do an easy recipe for you all so you could continue in your three days of sloth.

Pineapple Coconut Milkshakes with Dark Rum

For those of you that know me for who I am outside of Inside Pulse, you know I have two arch enemies: The first being Scott Levy. The second being Bobby Flay aka Asshat. However, in a show of friendship in regards to his being a good sport when I terrorized him many months ago in front of a life audience, I figured I’d highlight one of his recipes from Mesa Grill, his NYC place to dine. It’s no muss, it’s no fuss, and you get drunk off it.

Just please, no Jimmy Buffet songs to this drink. Asshat makes the joke about this in his book Boy Gets Grill and it only serves to make me wish even more that he was dead. Really dead.

Hint: Keep all the ingredients extra cold until the very last minute when you add them.


12 ounces (1 and a half cups) vanilla Ice cream. (Use Breyers. It is the best there is)
2 cups canned cream of coconut
2 cups diced ripe pineapple (Fresh if you can and eat the rest. It’s the best time of year for good fresh pineapple)
2 cups WHOLE milk (Skim milk is for losers)
1 cup dark rum
Whipped Cream (This is optional and for topping)
One-fourth cup sweetened flaked coconut, lightly toasted.


Okay ready for a simple recipe? Take all the ingredients except the whipped cream and toasted coconut and shove them into a blender. Blend until smooth. It’ll make 4 large drinks. Add the toasted coconut and whipped cream and BAM! Super easy alcohol fueled milkshakes!

Of course, I don’t drink. Or eat Coconut. But then I don’t eat Pumpkin or Cream Cheese and look at the coffee cake muffins I made tonight for dinner party guests. That’s the joy of being a cook. You make stuff you know other people will love! It’s art people!

Right. It’s 2am. I’ve appeared in half the sections of the page this week and am writing three reviews for the games section, which is pretty more than any three of our non Minneapolis based writers combined. I’m off to go to sleep and see how many people I have scarred this in the past 48 hours with my ability to turn Super Mario Brothers into a Phallus naming experience from hell.

Confused? It’s because you’re not cool enough to read my blog. Now go enjoy having your Monday off from work while I sleep till noon.