411MAX: News News Revolution 01.23.04

Welcome to my last Friday of no college obligation before the spring semester begins! And I actually have TIME to write an introduction this week, as opposed to LAST week, when I had a bunch of stuff to do in a very small time frame. Which stinks, because I had a bunch of cool stuff to write about.

Anyway, it was exactly a year last Friday since I asked my wonderful fiancé to marry me. And as luck would have it, she still feels the same way today. I don’t know where I’d be without her, and I appreciate every day I get to spend with her or talk with her. She is my rock, and I’m so glad she’s there to lean on.

Over on the DDR front, I’ve officially reached 404 AAAs. Yes, two weeks ago, it was 258. But after kicking myself into high gear, I’ve gotten over 100 more. The coolest thing is that at the end of 2003, I only had 204. In less than a month, I nearly double that. It scares even me to see how much I’ve improved at this game in the 3.5 years I’ve been playing.

For the record, I admit that all my AAAs have been acquired at home, and not in the arcades. I’ll also admit that AAAs are easier to get at home considering the timing windows are looser on home mixes than in the arcades. However, I’ll still count them considering that I don’t have much time to go to the arcades these days. Playing at home requires no additional money in quarters, and I can play as many times as I feel like. So don’t listen to the “hardcore” players who practically live at the arcades and only count arcade accomplishments as “true” accomplishments. If you’re able to do something in the comfort of your own home, that’s good enough. Believe me.

(Actually, I managed my FIRST EVER arcade AAA last night. It was Do You Remember Me on Light, but it was still a AAA, and I’m still gonna count it! I only wish I had my camera…Anyway, the total is now 405. Bow down to me.)

I would also like to express my heartfelt, unbridled JOY that the Eagles have been knocked out of the Super Bowl for the third year in a row. Two weeks ago, I hoped the Eagles would DIE in an embarrassing loss, and the Panthers have made my wish come true. Oddly enough, I chose the Panthers as my go-to team for the Super Bowl this year since my beloved Redskins are not there…again…ugh. (Thank God for Joe Gibbs!) Anyway, a Panther-Patriot Super Bowl is fine by me. No complaints.

Well, that takes are of a LONG intro to make up for last week’s lack of one. So, ON WITH THE NEWS!

TOP STORY: Bring More Bemani Stateside!

This gets Top Story this week because Bemani is the best music franchise ever, and Lee Baxley is in full support along with me.

Anyway, a website has sprung up entitled BringMoreBemani.com. It is an official petition website to Namco Cybertainment arcades to bring more import Bemani games to the US. This includes the Beatmania series, Beatmania IIDX, Pop’n Music, Guitar Freaks/Drummania, Dance ManiaX, and all the other great games that never saw as wide a release as DDR has.

So do us all a favor and go to that website, register with them, and officially sign the petition. Assuming it gets enough signatures, Chicago will be used as a “test market” for more Bemani machines. And if THAT flourishes, we’ll see more Bemani games in Namco brand arcades across America!

So SIGN the damn thing! GO! NOW! (Well, read the rest of the report first. THEN GO!)

(Credit goes to DDRFreak)

Otakon, Meet Mario. Mario, Otakon.

Konami of Japan has recently unveiled a HUGE trailer for the upcoming Metal Gear Solid: The Twin Snakes. Plus, you can view it here.

The trailer clocks in at nearly 27 minutes, and contains various cinemas included in the game. There is no gameplay footage, but the cinemas included are extremely well done, and far beyond what the PS1 was ever capable of.

Plus, Konami gives Nintendo a huge nod by including certain figurines of Nintendo characters that Otakon displays on his computer monitor. It’s hilarious and COOL. So give the trailer a look-see if you have an extra half-hour to kill. It’s great stuff.

(Credit goes to Games Are Fun)

Please, Please, PLEASE Get The Wrong Answer!

You know it’s a light news week when I resort to covering games with female nudity in them.

In any case, developer Top Heavy Studios is currently developing The Guy Game, a hodgepodge trivia game like You Don’t Know Jack, but with flashing girls and a drinking game to boot.

The game will work like this: You’ll be able to answer trivia questions. The same questions will be asked to select “top heavy” girls in the form of video clips. If they get those questions wrong, they have to flash the camera.

The catch is, however, that you won’t be able to see the bouncy-bouncies immediately. Every time a player answers a question correctly, they fill a meter known as the “Flash-O-Meter”. When you first start out, the boobs are covered with the game’s logo. When it gets to the middle, it’s replaced with a mosaic. But when you fill it completely, the video becomes uncensored.

God, this is a stupid idea for a game. Seriously. I mean for one, the game comes with a Mature rating already. If you’re going to show digitized boobs, do it from the beginning. That’ll make all the horny teens happy. And I don’t like the concept of a drinking game being included. Do you REALLY expect a bunch of guys to get together and drink a six-pack each while watching softcore computer porn? I mean HONESTLY?

More news needs to come down the pike that’s more interesting than this garbage.

(Credit goes to Gamespot)

And unless I cover the new Nintendo device (which has already been done by Bryan Berg), that’s all I got for the week. Damn college moving. Once I get settled, expect more interesting news bites. Until then, lets review the week that was with the…


Haikus. Not the most traditional, but fun to do nonetheless. Let’s get to recapping.

Drakengard release
Will come on March the 2nd
Is rated “Mature”

X-Box in Japan
Two new models will come forth
Go thank DOA.

Hey, it’s Actraiser!
Remade for the GBA!
I get to play God!

Shining Force remade.
Coming to America
I will thank Atlus.

Nintendo DS
A new handheld from the kings.
NOT new GBA.

It will have two screens.
Can show more aspects of games.
It sounds pretty cool.

A Mature Rating
For the new Ninja Gaiden.
Gory fighting scenes!

Warner Brothers games
Made by Warner Brothers guys.
New developers.

One million copies.
That’s how much X-2 has sold.
Looks like women sell!

Who is Number 2?
Nintendo or Microsoft?
We all need to know!

Famicon SP
A GBA, classic look.
Comes with 8-Bit games.

Must have Bemani!
I need Pop’n Music NOW!
Sign the petition!

The Twin Snakes trailer.
Contains scenes that make jaws drop.
Game better be good.

Trivia with tits.
Will sell millions ’cause of tits.
Just look at X-2!

Confused by these things?
Read the other news reports.
They will set you straight.

Whew. Getting late. Onto Cheat!


This week, we take a look at another handheld game.

SHINING SOUL (Nintendo Game Boy Advance)

Lucard submitted a code to this report. Lucard is God. Well, more so of a God than before.

So, from Lucard’s mouth to this report, here’s how to get infinite gold:

1. Enter any shop and use the Control Pad to highlight an item from your inventory. Press the A Button to place the item on your cursor, then move the cursor over to the Sell box on the right side of the screen.

2. Press the R Button, then the B Button, to return the item to your inventory. Highlight any item you can afford to purchase and press the A Button to place it on your cursor.

3. Move the cursor over to the left so that it is over any of your inventory slots, then press the R Button to move the item back to the Sell box. Press the A Button to sell the shop its own item. This can be repeated indefinitely.


The greatest buncha guys on the Internet write stuff for this section of the site. We are KLIQ! Through and through!

So this week, we’re going to try something a little different with plugs. This week, I am going to install something in this section called “Reward Points”. What are Reward Points you ask? Well, much in the same vein as Cory’s Pimp awards and Berg’s former Gold medals, each piece here on 411Games will be rated with a certain number of “points”. Points will be determined on the strength of each column/report/review, and have no direct minimum or maximum. The more one writes, the more points one will get. The more cool stuff they write, the higher the point totals.

Points will accumulate from week to week, and the writers may one day have a chance to trade these points for…stuff…I dunno. I’ll figure it out when I figure it out.

One more thing: these points are strictly for fun, and for the most part, pointless. Kinda like Who’s Line Is It Anyway. So why am I doing it? Because I CAN! So, here we go!

Top Billing

411 Games Presents: The Best Of 2003 — The Kliq
We all chipped in for this one, and it’s awesome. Completely awesome. These are the only awards that are given out to the truly deserving of the 2003 gaming universe, and not to Madden/GTA/Tomb Raider/Final Fantasy. Everyone gets points for this one.
Reward Points: 100 To All Members

Dreamcast: Sega’s Last Scream — The Kliq
Our best feature to date. My contributions are limited due to real life stuff, but the other Kliq members shine through with looks at the best stuff the DC had to offer. If you didn’t play any of these games, well, you all SUCK! (Well, not really. You just need to play these games. NOW!)
Reward Points: 100 To All Members

News You Can Use

Gamer’s Hangover News Report — Cory Laflin
Light on news this week, but Cory relates quotes of a movie I’ve never seen to gaming events of 2003. The best quote/event relation goes to the “Biker…I am an idiot.“/N-Gage comparison. That made me laugh.
Reward Points: 75 / Total: 275

Mid-Week Mid-Boss News Report — Lee Baxley
The Bad Guy is back to making everyone else look bad with all of these new-fangled pictures/cool-looking HTML. He also gives us some kick-ass news stories that are awesome, including remaking the original Actraiser on the GBA. Any game that allows me to play G-O-D and command a naked cherub to do my bidding is a major plus. This game is SO mine when it gets a stateside release.
Reward Points: 125 / Total: 325

Thank God It’s Thursday News Report — Bryan Berg
Berg kicks all kinds of ass. He also called the review of NFL Street before I could. (God dammit!) Anyway, he talks about the new Nintendo device, Ninja Gaiden’s mature rating, and how he would market a “relaunching” of the Turbo Graphix (hypothetically speaking, of course) in a five-system war. That commentary is a MUST-read. Definitely.
Reward Points: 150 / Total: 350

Reviews You Can Use

Arx Fatalis (XB) — Alex Lucard
Lucard is handling the lion’s share of reviewing these days, and making us look like lowly peons for not reviewing as much as him. Anyway, he reviews a game that plays like Morrowind, yet is very linear. What’s his call? Read and find out!
Reward Points: 70 / Total: 270

Sonic Advance 2 (GBA) — Bebito Jackson
Bebito’s back and is reviewing a GBA title that’s been out for close to a year now! But you gotta give him credit for it. He loves Sonic games more than I do, and this game is deserving for a look from 411’s finest. But the Sonic Battle review goes to me. And it’s going to be equally as awesome as this one. I guarantee it.
Reward Points: 110 / Total: 310

Star Wars Rogue Squadron 3: Rebel Strike (GC) — Michael O’Reilly
One of 411’s freelance reviewers takes on this game, and puts forth a pretty solid review. Take a look when you’re interested.
Reward Points: 50 / Total: 250

Fallout: Brotherhood Of Steel (XB) — Alex Lucard
Another review from one of the 411Games cornerstone guys. This time, he looks at one of the post-nuclear adventures from the Fallout franchise. Take a gander, and don’t breath in the toxic fumes.
Reward Points: 90 / Total: 360

Columns You Can…uh…Use

The Gamer’s Conscience — Fredrick Badlissi
This is proof positive that when Fred sits down and thinks about something…he can come up with some VERY strange conclusions. I personally don’t buy into what he’s selling this week, but he does make a good argument for it. and now it’s my sole mission in life to come up with why there’s a playable bear in Tekken Tag Tournament
Reward Points: 100 / Total: 300

A Thumb To The Eye — chuck Platt
MY FAVORITE WRITER goes back to his roots and sticks thumbs in other people’s eyes! And it really hurts! Seriously, he’s no longer in the news business, but back to what he does best: making people laugh. And providing some thought-provoking stuff to boot. And for the record, Clap Hands had potential. At least I think it did. But the Thumb works all the same.
Reward Points: 150 / Total: 350


He’ll be back next week in the Tuesday slot of News stuff. Look for him there!
Reward Points: 0 / Total: 200

Voila! Reward Points! Good? Bad? Ugly? Insert incomplete sentence here?


With the report finished, now comes the part where I frantically pack a ton of things for the big move back to Towson University, and the praying that they won’t break. Fun, fun, fun!

Look for reviews for Sonic Battle for the GBA, and Intellivision Lives! for the X-Box within the coming weeks. The frantic nature of my schedule shouldn’t come into play once I get back into my groove.

Until next time, worship Chuck Platt. Why? He’s shipping me an actual Master System! He is my new God for the next day or so.

Alex Williams