411MAX: News News Revolution 12.02.03

Time once again for the Tuesday News, and I’m JUST the man to give it! Have a nice Thanksgiving, everyone? I know I did. I’m feeling rested, recharged, and…oh crap, finals are two weeks away, aren’t they? Okay, scratch that. I’m more stressed now than I’ve been in a while, I’ve got four projects to do in the span of two weeks, AND finals to worry about. Time to start praying I don’t screw up!

Anyway, back to Thanksgiving. The holiday was very nice. I got to see family in another state I hardly ever get to see, and we had a great meal, complete with Thanksgiving Brisket! (I love being Jewish!)

I also beat Disgaea over the long weekend. But I got a pretty sucky ending, so I’m gonna have to go through the WHOLE THING again to try and get a better one. Oh well.

In any case, time to get back into the groove of things. ON WITH THE NEWS!
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TOP STORY: DDR World Record Broken!

The Dance Dance Revolution community will not soon forget the name of Drew Gamble, who spent a solid 37 1/2 hours playing a DDR machine. In doing so, he has officially broken the world’s record for most consecutive hours played!

And I get tired after an hours worth of arrow smashing. Whew…

Anyway, he and Chris Machado officially went for the record together at the Bend River Mall, however, Machado messed up around the 18-hour mark and quit.

The Guinness Book of World Records standards allowed one fifteen-minute break every eight hours, and only 30 seconds in between songs to play. (Given that each song is about one minute and thirty seconds, that’s about 30 songs an hour, and that would mean he played over 1,000 consecutive stages!)

The record was NOT done purely for his own amusement, however. He collected money throughout the event and donated the proceeds to a home to help pregnant teens. People pledged a certain amount for each hour he danced, and others donated separately in a separate jar.

I gotta give this guy credit. He goes and practically KILLS himself for charity, all the while doing something he loves. I tip my hat to him.

(Credit goes to Games Are Fun and DDRFreak)
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Are You Happy NOW, IIDX Fans? HAPPY?!? HAPPY?!?!?!?!?

Who says that online petitions can’t get you what you want?

Over in Japan, Konami’s Bemani series Beatmania IIDX has been absent from the PS2 since BM IIDX 6th Style. Fans have been pretty irate because of this, since the Japanese arcades have seen 7th, 8th, and 9th Styles released without a new home version in sight.

Anyway, earlier in the year, Konami offered an online petition on whether a new IIDX home version should be made. It reached over 10,000 signatures, which led Konami to decide to develop a home version of BM IIDX 7th Style as a limited release.

You can preorder the game on the KonamiStyle website, and can expect the game’s release in a few months.

Konami says “you’re welcome”, by the way.

(Credit goes to <Games Are Fun)
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Seven New Wastes of Money For Developers

Seven new games have been announced for the Nokia N-Gage.

I only mention it here because otherwise, you’ll never know they exist.

These are all scheduled for release in 2004:

Ashen
Operation Shadow
Requiem of Hell
Sega Rally Championship
Tom Clancy’s Ghost Recon: Jungle Storm
Worms
WWE

Speaking of which, did anyone see the commercials for FIFA Soccer and NCAA Football for this thing? Weren’t they the UGLIEST sports titled you’ve seen in a while?

Maybe I shouldn’t have retired the mindless N-Gage bashing after all…

(Credit goes to GameSpot)
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Aren’t They Through Re-releasing That Game YET?!?!?

Over in Japan, Capcom’s going to release yet ANOTHER version of their Hyper Street Fighter II game for the arcades. It will apparently be based upon the anniversary game for the PS2.

I could make a comment on how Street Fighter II was released enough, and after all these years, new re-releases of the same games aren’t that cool, even though I love this game, but I won’t.

But wait…I already did…oops…

(Credit goes to GameSpot)
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Virtua Fighter Becomes Battle Networked?

Remember the rumors involving a Virtua Fighter RPG of some sort on the GameCube? Well, we may finally have an answer to that…and it’s one strange answer indeed…

Sega has officially announced Virtua Fighter: Cyber Generation, an action-RPG headed for the Nintendo GameCube and Sony PS2. As said on GameSpy:

The game revolves around virtual reality and a computer program gone awry called the “nexus” – players take on the role of a 14 year old treasure hunter and a local 15 year old female friend who find themselves drawn into an adventure revolving around Nexus, virtual reality and learning (and mastering) a variety of fighting skills in and around their floating marine metropolis home.

Of course, my first reaction to this news was, and I quote, “OH, COME ON!” I waited months and months for MegaMan Battle Network with Virtua Fighter characters? Does EVERYTHING have to fall pawn to this kind of treatment?

But then again, I was wrong about MegaMan Battle Network after playing for a while. So lets see how this game will shape up…

(Credit goes to GameSpy)

And your news portion of the column is here by complete. Now, it’s onto the next one:
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CHEAT!

This week, we’re going with a game that I just reviewed for you fine people:

MARIO KART: DOUBLE DASH (GC)

Read this list of unlockable goodies, or I shall throw a giant Birdo egg at you! (Yeah, that sounds threatening…)

To start with, here’s a list of unlockable items. You’ll obtain them when you receive a gold trophy:

50cc Mushroom Cup: Green Fire Kart
50cc Flower Cup: Bloom Coach Kart
50cc Star Cup: Para Wing Kart
100cc Mushroom Cup: Rattle Buggy Kart
100cc Flower Cup: Waluigi Racer Kart
100cc Star Cup: Special Cup
50cc Special Cup: Bullet Blaster Kart
100cc Special Cup: Toad & Toadette, and the Toad Kart
150cc Mushroom Cup: Luigi’s Mansion Battle Stage
150cc Flower Cup: Turbo Birdo Kart
150cc Star Cup: Barrel Train Kart
150cc Special Cup: All Tour Cup
150cc All Tour Cup:Mirror Mode
Mirror Mushroom Cup: Toadette Kart
Mirror Flower Cup: Tilt-A-Kart Battle Stage
Mirror Star Cup: King Boo & Petey Piranha, and the Piranha Pipes Kart
Mirror Special Cup: Boo Pipes Kart
Mirror All Tour Cup: Parade Kart, New Title Screen, and New Thank You Screen

Plus, there’s a funny easter egg to see. When you start the game and see the Nintendo logo, hold the A button. When Lakitu appears, he’ll have a fish on his pole instead of the normal “Ready” lights.

(Credit goes to GameFAQs)
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COMMENTARY: The Haiku Riddle Answers!

To start with, I want to thank everyone who entered last week’s X-Box Live contest. The winners have been notified, and upon reception of their home addresses, they’ll get their free game as soon as possible!

Anyway, I’d figure I’d devote this space to divulging the answers to last weeks contest riddles. Most of you who entered got 10 or more of them right, and on some entries, I got some…interesting answers, to say the least.

So for the curious and not-so curious, here are haiku riddles, and answers:

1) Do not close your eyes
Or else you will this guy
Messing with all time

ANSWER: Blinx (Blinx: The Time Sweeper)
Most of you guessed this, but I got some Prince of Persia answers mixed in there.

2) Some think he can fly,
But he does amazing things
Using just four wheels.

ANSWER: Tony Hawk (Any Tony Hawk game on the X-Box)
One of the few “no-brainers” out of the bunch. But someone guessed Big Mother Truckers. That made me laugh, but strangely sad at the same time…

3) Bodily functions
Are part of both these guys’ lives,
Way back on launch day.

ANSWER: Abe & Munch (Oddworld: Munch’s Odyssey)
About 75% of you got this one. I got a few Toe Jam & Earl responses as well. News flash, people, THEY WEREN’T OUT ON LAUNCH DAY!

4) He was a coach once,
Now he will announce to you
All the play-by-plays.

ANSWER: John Madden (Madden NFL Series)
99% correct ratio here. Congratulations.

5) Just like a blue blur,
Running across the whole world
Battling robots.

ANSWER: Sonic the Hedgehog (Sonic Heroes)
Another no-brainer out of the bunch. Someone guessed Jet Set Radio Future but that doesn’t count since you’re in-line skating around the city.

6) Free, expansive world
It’s your mission to be come
The Nerevarine

ANSWER: The Elder Scrolls III: Morrowind (Original, or GOTY Edition)
The “Nerevarine” clue gave this away for anyone who played this. Those who didn’t guessed either True Live Online or Fable.

7) Lands across the stars
There, Light and Dark will beckon
You to join their side.

ANSWER: Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic
Everyone guessed Star Wars, yet a few guessed Clone Wars. Oh well.

8) Take it to the air,
As you see the country’s own
Alternate future.

ANSWER: Crimson Skies: High Road To Revenge
You guys did me proud with this one. The clue was in the review posted the SAME DAY!

9) Move to the music
You’re fine as long as you Keep
Ya body movin’.

ANSWER: Dance Dance Revolution: Ultramix
If you know me, and you should, you KNEW I’d include a DDR haiku in there somewhere. But those who guessed X-Box Music Maker should be drug out into the street and shot. (Well, not really.)

10) Last seen years ago,
This ninja is a legend
And will soon appear.

ANSWER: Ninja Gaiden
One of the harder ones out of the bunch, and I got some varied guesses. But most of you got this.

11) Infiltrate the base,
Not a sound, but if you’re seen,
Tranquilize the guards!

ANSWER: Metal Gear Solid 2: Substance
Now this is where you guys got tripped up. Over half of you guessed Splinter Cell, and were WAY off the mark. The clue “tranquilize the guards” meant when Snake initially boarded the naval base with only his smokes and a tranquilizer. Those who got this right most definitely got the free game. That’s how few got it right. And kudos to you for looking past the steaming pile that was Splinter Cell! (Oh boy, watch the hate mail pile up.)

12) 2-D’s finest guys
Fighting against each other
For the second time.

ANSWER: Capcom VS SNK2
Another gimme in the bunch. Most everyone got it.

And there you have it. Again, thanks to all who entered, and continue clicking here to see NEW contests in the coming weeks!
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PLUGS AND SHILLS THAT PAY THE BILS

I took a week off, so there’s a whole mess of stuff to look at.

News You Can Use

Hump Day Otaku News Report — Lee Baxley
Someone goofed and put this in the “News” section instead of the “News Reports” section. (I’m lookin’ at YOU, Chris!) Anyway, Lee covers FFXII, Xenosaga 2, and the AWESOME news about the Sega Ages titles coming over here. He also names the RPGs to drool over. Guess which ones. No, really. Guess!

Thank God It’s FRIDAY News Report — Bryan Berg
Many thanks to Brian for filling in for me this past Friday. He talks about Rockstar troubles, PS2 and GBA sales, and the awesomeness that is Tecmo Bowl. Personally, I’m a (NES) Tecmo Super Bowl fan myself, but the games aren’t entirely different. Screw Madden, gimme some 8-Bit football goodness!

Gamer’s Hangover News Report — Cory Laflin
Taking a page from Bryan’s book on plugging, I will give you the phrase that MUST make you read Cory’s commentary on the ESRB ratings: “E — Everyone. Safe. No objectionable content. Comic violence and mischief at most. Will not cause your toddler to become a serial killer.” HAW! Funny, funny stuff. He rules. And he gave me another Pimp Stick. Now I can keep more of my hoes in line! (Where my money, BI-ATCH!)

Reviews You Can Use

Crimson Skies: High Road To Revenge (XB) — Me, Myself, and I
One of the better X-Box Live titles to grace our store shelves. And I PROVE it!

Amped 2 (XB) — Chris Pankonin
My boss and good friend reviews the latest snowboarding title for the X-Box. It also has X-Box Live support. I LOVE X-BOX LIVE! (Now where’s my royalty check? Sell-out? Who, me?)

Kareoke Revolution (PS2) — Chuck Platt
My favorite writer reviews a game I want, yet have no money for. And it sucks, because it’s a music game by Konami! And while I can’t dance, I’m sure I can come up with my own choreography. Which makes me a sad, sad man.

Final Fantasy X-2 — Lee Baxley
FFX was one of my favorite Final Fantasy titles, and Baxley convinces me that I need the sequel. ARGH! I HATE having no money!

Columns You Can…uh…Use

The Angry Gamer — Liquidcross
And the look at the entire MegaMan series concludes with looking at the MegaMan Zero games…or DOES IT?!?!? MUAHAHAHAHAHA!…Okay, there’s an epilogue next week. So sue me.

The Gamer’s Conscience — Fredrick Badlissi
Thanks to the endorphin high caused by too much turkey, Fred sticks with a good ol’ mailbag. I wish I got enough mail for a mailbag…at this rate, I’ll have enough in 17 years! (I’m kidding of course. It’s really more like 16.)
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PARTING THOUGHTS

Just as a note, if my columns suddenly dip in quality over the next couple of weeks, you will officially have school and evil projects to blame for it. The stress level is crazy, I tells ya.

Stay tuned for Lee tomorrow, Bryan Thursday, and me AGAIN of Friday. (Why, oh WHY did I agree to two news reports?)

(Answer: Because I’m THAT COOL! Or sad. I can’t tell, really.)

Until next time, seek me out on DDR Ultramix Live! The gamer tag is Tuxedo Alex.

Alex Williams


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