(411 DOWN-LO ONLINE 10-21-02: BEGIN TRANSMISSION…)
I’m sure all of you already know who I am *crickets chirping in background*, but for the two or three who don’t allow me to introduce myself. This is Bebito and I am a gaming gossip whore. First off I know EVERYTHING. Don’t ask me how I know… I just do. If I don’t know it, NOBODY knows it. *looks around to see if anyone is buying it* I don’t do news, but rather my specialty is writing the most recent and hottest videogame industry rumors and speculation this side of yo momma’s varicose veins. Previously I handled the world famous Rumor Mill for the now defunct websites (www.segadcpower.com) & (www.gaminginfinity.com). And now I’m here. Everything else you don’t know you’ll learn as we go. Ok, now that we have that established, I am seriously proud to call 411 *thumps up, smile with teeth showing* my new home. Today is my debut column but you can catch me from now on right here every Thursday night. Mad thanks to Ashish for liking my work enough to have me join the family. Of course he then threatened to fire me if don’t update regularly and learn how to use spell check… but he’s still a really great guy! Now *removes lips from Ashish’s butt* let’s get started.
This is how it works folks and I’m not going to repeat myself (until maybe the next column) so listen up. First I give you the dirt you’re craving and then I give you the Down-Lo Rating. This is like a gauge to tell you how much of a chance these juicy tidbits have of becoming fact. A rating of 1 is something I don’t even believe in while a rating at 10 is a prophecy from the gaming gods. And yes, I do throw my opinion in there so get used to it. It’s as simple as that. If you have any questions about past rumors or other gossip you want some validating on, drop me a line and I will get back to you. Just give me some time cuz I don’t just want to give you some crap of an answer if I don’t know it yet. I’ll check it out for ya. I dunna know, maybe I’ll even post your question in the column and answer it there as a Down-Lo if I find some real dirt on it. Can ya feel me? Aight then.
Oh, and one last minute thing. Before we begin I want everyone to make two lines. Those that understand that these are just rumors (although normally reliable ones) on the right and those that are going to whine, cry, and moan to me every time a report doesn’t pan out on the left (I’ve never gotten anyone yet, but just to make sure). For those on the left please see your way out. Sorry you don’t belong here. Click the BACK button on your browser and go read some reviews or hard news from Ron Yip (he’s a great columnist by the way! *thumps up, smile with teeth showing*). For those on the right, welcome. I love you all! And may God have mercy on you.
This is the Down-Lo.
REACH FOR THE SKIES
OK class, everyone who has owned or played and liked a Dreamcast say “I”. Oh my quite a few of you good. Alright alright, calm down! I’m not going to continue until the Soul Caliber chants stop… Thank you. Me? I personally loved the silly thing. As a RPG addict though, I have to admit that the machine didn’t have too many great RPG classics. Evolution (ok), Evolution II (yawn), and Time Stalkers (keep it away!) just didn’t cut it. Amidst the crap laid a couple of amazing traditional RPGs. Grandia II is one, and the often overlooked but heavily loved by those that have played it Skies of Arcadia is the other. For those who don’t know what’s up, in Skies you play as a band of air pirates that was just as into stealing as they were into giving to the poor (or somethin’ like dat; they were good pirates aight). It was awesome because it combined ground combat seamlessly with enormous epic air ship battles. Sega flat out announced that they’d be porting it to the PS2 for a new audience. (Yeah!) Then it got cancelled. (BOOO!) Don’t worry though, it got canned because they’re making a sequel! (WHOO!) Apparently the original port was not done in house by Sega and was not up to snuff anyway so good for us and good for the PS2! Great thing is the old cast is back with a few new additions so that those familiar with the back-story get special treatment. Apparently Sega wants to make this their RPG franchise of choice. Fine with me! And Sega will probably admit it in a few months. Look for something around Spring of next year or late Winter this year as far as announcement wise. In the meantime those with Dreamcasts that haven’t played this classic yet, go track it down and buy it. As for those who don’t own a Dreamcast, what are you waiting for? Those things are what like 8 bucks now right?
DOWN-LO RATING: 7
JUST WHAT REALLY IS UP WITH THE PS3?
Those that may have paid attention to News.com may have heard some interesting comments from Kenichi Fukunaga. Who’s he? Why is he in the news? How do you pronounce that? Sorry can’t help you with the third one, but to answer the first two he’s a spokesman for Sony Computer Entertainment and he’s in the news because people asked him about Sony’s tight-lipped project the Playstation3. Check dis out, “We’re not thinking about hardware,” said Kenichi Fukunaga, “The ideal solution would be having an operating system installed in various home appliances that could run game programs.” Interesting thing is, Sony is putting its money where its mouth is. By now you’ve probably heard of the chip project code named Cell between Sony, IBM and Toshiba. These guys want to make a chip so powerful that we can hook it up to our vacuum cleaners and play Virtua Fighter 5. “We’ve started with boxes–making boxes to do specific things. But if you have a chip this powerful, you can add functions to any box. It’s reverse thinking,” Fukunaga said. So when can we expect this super-chip to be done and by extension our PS3s? It should all be wrapped up by 2005. What do I think? I think it’s cool if they can pull it off. Sadly I have a feeling this technology is much farther away than we might think. As of now Sony isn’t even sure how they would integrate the chip into the PS3. Rumor has it that they want to put the chip in Internet servers along with home electronics to divide computing tasks among networked machines. They seem determined. And when a company like Sony says something, even as bold as the PS3 not coming in box form, they’re probably not craping around. There’s no official announcement regarding the PS3 itself so this is still rumor. We’ll see I guess. Wait shhhhh. You hear that sound? That’s me not holding my breath.
DOWN-LO RATING: 5
MICKEY & TIDUS WORK WELL TOGETHER; MINNIE GETS JEALOUS
For those of you who have played Kingdom Hearts *pat on the back* good for you! Odds are you probably liked it. If you didn’t notice, Square put quite a bit of production value into that baby of theirs (even more than usual). Big name stars abounded playing the lead characters’ roles with almost all of the Disney characters’ voices being done by their original voice actors (with a few notable exceptions) and it certainly pushed up the quality. Why so much loving care? Because this is Square’s next Final Fantasy ladies and gentlemen and they want it to succeed. Looking at the sales charts since its release seems to indicate that it did. And ya know what that means? Sequels and lots of em’. Nope this isn’t a one shot deal, and we can look forward to seeing the beginnings of something as early as Summer 2003. Great news if, like me, you loved the game (yes I love a Disney game… so there).
DOWN-LO RATING: 8
And that’s the Down-Lo. Man three Playstation rumors in a row?! I’ve got to make up for that later. Join me again this Thursday. Peace.
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