Pulse Cannon

March 22, 2006

Sorry I can’t stay long, I just figured I would write to let you know I’m ok, and living in the wonderful world of Oblivion. Much has happened since I first rented this. I’ve seen the Emperor die right before my very eyes, and I didn’t get blamed much to my surprise. I’ve discovered my previously unused ability to cast magic spells, I’ve learned how to be a pickpocket, and I’ve traveled to other dimensions and slain their inhabitants. As a matter of fact I seem to be slaying a lot of people since I’ve gotten here. It seems that I’m a really blood thirsty bastard when it comes right down to it. Oh well, all in the name of profit I say. I’ll write more when I can think of something to tell you (basically when I’ve killed more people and done it in a way that’s worthy of the telling).

March 25, 2006

Well, I’ve managed to drag myself away from the 360 long enough to write you all another letter, as I’m beginning to suspect I may never fully return from Oblivion. Everywhere I look it seems as though I’m discovering something else to do. I’m on a quest now, as I’m a member of “The Blades”. I thought they were just some figure skating team but to my delight they are the personal guards of the Emperor. Sweet. I wonder if I get to wear one of those spiffy red outfits like the Emperors guards did on the Death Star. Anyway, I’ve managed to level up a few times, and who knows what will happen once I start to get some real spells.

March 27, 2006

The game had to go back today. I was sorely tempted to bring the case back and leave the game in the system, but that would be a nasty trick to pull, so I did what I had to do. I returned it. I did it by convincing myself about what a buggy piece of software the game really is, though in all honesty I don’t truly hold it against the game. Riding a horse (Oh yes, I got a horse! Imagine, me, the equestrian!) causes the 360 to just chug along like you’re riding a bike on the sidewalk, every couple of seconds, you hit a bump. You can almost predict it. The bump in this case is the load screen that temporarily slows down the game. And I really don’t like how I can’t attack anything while on the back of my horse. I have a bow, I have some arrows, what gives? These are the things I told myself as I returned the game.

March 29, 2006

I’m experiencing hunger pains and I’m feeling a strong need to sneak around in some ancient tomb. Clearly I’m going to have to obtain a copy of Oblivion so I can get this out of my system. Or further into my system, however it works. I don’t care, I just know I need it. Excuse me while I try to hammer my armour back into shape. Oblivion is coming and I will be prepared. See you next week…maybe.