Pulse Cannon

Hey, how ya been? Really? Fascinating. Me? Oh I’ve been just swell. One might even go so far as to say I’m downright peachy. Let’s just say that someone somewhere doesn’t want my computer to get back up and running. So that’s why the Cannon has managed to maintain a bi-monthly schedule the past couple of months. Now then, let’s go talk about stuff. After all, this isn’t The Mike’s Bitching About Computer Problems Cannon.

So, what’s been happening in the world of gaming? Well let’s see. I was named Tom P’s favorite Canadian…so that’s a plus. I’ve never worn the colours and represented this great nation but its an honor and a priviledge.. what? Not like I’ll be standing on an Olympic podium anytime soon, gotta grab that glory whilst I can.

In other news, Acclaim has somehow managed to rise from the dead. Here’s the funny thing. This isn’t even some former stock holder buying the rights to the old company and reviving it. This is a Korean company figuring that the Acclaim brand name has enough marketing pull to allow it access to the North American market. Not a bad idea, if we weren’t talking about Acclaim here. But we are. So here’s the thing. It’s a bad BAD idea. Solution? Burn it! Kill it dead and don’t let it rise again like some mutant zombified husk of a game company. Again that is.

I had to learn the hard way just how piss poor Acclaim was at making games. Sometimes they’d succeed in spite of themselves, which was the kicker. The first Turok was an outstanding game, for its time anyway. Yes there was fog everywhere, but it was ambience at the time, not poor programming. But for every Turok there was a glitched Turok 2, or a glitched All Star Baseball, or a glitched something else. Every product the company made seemed to have a freeze issue or a crash bug. I should have learned this on the Saturn, or even before that. But it took me well into the N64’s lifespan before the ban hammer came down on all Acclaim products. From then on I had the shields up whenever I spied that rainbow coloured logo on a game box. I suspect at some point a great many people developed this same shielding, as the company did cease to exist eventually. And no, I didn’t shed a tear when it died. Let’s hope the new company doesn’t pick up where the old one left off.

In other news we may have a nightmare developing for EA. It seems that if the NFL and its PA can’t get a collective bargaining agreement in place soon, EA’s exclusivity deal for the NFL will fall apart. From what I’ve read it has something to do with horses heads and eyes of newts… no sorry that’s not right. It’s got more to do with the PA decertifying itself rather than getting locked out at the beginning of the 2007 season. When that happens (and apparently it’s not such a huge leap to think it might) the PA portion of the deal with EA becomes void due to anti-trust legislation in the US. This is of course all probably a bunch of nothing, as the NFL and its PA are not going to kill the golden goose, meaning EA will at some point breath a sigh of relief and resume printing money with Madden. Then again, they were stupid enough to want an exclusive football game maker to begin with, so maybe Paul Tagliabue is starting to lose it.

Finally, it appears Oblivion, the savior of 360 owners everywhere, has gone gold and will be shipping to stores on March 20. And with that, we have concluded another Pulse Cannon. Hopefully I’ll see you all again next week, but if not, soon!