Pulse Cannon

Pulse Cannon
Mikael O’Reilly

Hello there. This is Michael’s clone, Mikael, I’ll be filling in on the Pulse Cannon this week as Michael is busy finishing up his Metal Gear Solid 3 review. Michael has left a list of games that he played in the past two weeks. What can go wrong? Anyway, the games Michael has been playing these past two weeks include: Halo 2, Rome: Toga War, and Burnout 3, which I assume is his state of mind and why he activated me. On with the games then, shall we?

I’ll begin with this Rome: Toga War. To be honest I don’t know where Michael finds these games. And honestly, who on earth would want a game based on toga fighting? I can’t imagine who. Perhaps if they were really well armed gladiators or something. But knowing him it’s probably some group of senators all trying to get their shots in at Julius Caesar. Anyway, he wrote down that he finally finished the campaign and felt most satisfied. He seems to say here that he wants to start up another campaign as soon as possible. Well, whatever gets you through the night I suppose…

Next up I’ll tell you about Michael’s experiences lately with Halo 2. Now, Michael apparently wrote a review about this game already, so he says here on the note that he decided to try some alternate ways of getting online, whatever that means. Supposedly there are a couple of tunnel programs? What the hell do Tunnels have to do with anything? I swear that man makes no sense at all sometimes. Oh hell most of the time lets be honest here. Its not like he’s going to be reading this, he’s too busy with his Snake or something. And I don’t even want to go near THAT with a 20 foot pole. Anyway, he says that these tunnels, like Gamespy and X-Box Connect, are worth a look if you want to experience none of the useful features that Bungie, whomever THEY are, included for use on X-Box Live. He also states that you shouldn’t be expecting large numbers of people playing on X-Box Connect, as the program isn’t widely known.

Lastly we come to Michael’s supposed state of affairs, he of the Burnout mind. Level 3 apparently. He mentions something about crash modes and…I can’t make this out. Either he’s talking about running cars off the road being incredibly stress relieving, or cherry pies being bad for your health. I tell you this man’s handwriting is simply god awful! Hell I’ve been working like mad to decipher these scribblings, but for all I know all of my writing so far could be a total mistake. Next time I’m going to demand that he type things out like a normal human being, none of this horrible cuniform he calls handwriting.

Well, I hope you’ve enjoyed the Pulse Cannon this week. Personally I think it’s been a tremendous success, despite Michael’s lack of input. He should be back in two weeks. Or maybe not, as it is the holiday season fast approaching. This is Mikael signing off for now.