The Angry Gamer 08.26.04 – Sexually Explicit

Just when I thought things couldn’t sink any lower with the gaming community, I see this on the official BloodRayne 2 website:

“Rayne is 100% topless and smokin’ hot in the October issue of Playboy magazine. This is a first in videogame history and trust us when we say that Rayne does not disappoint. The magazine hits newsstands in early September so here’s a great excuse to get a copy!”

I swear, I think I felt my brain seize up when I read that. Not content with silicone boobies…we’ve devolved into digital boobies. Silicone ones may be fake, but at least they’re physically tangible! This better not kickstart a new generation of adolescents who jack off to 3D renderings. That hentai shit is bad enough. Are the developers really so hard-up (no pun intended) to promote their game that they need to resort to such a lowest-common-denominator stunt? This is likely a foreshadowing that the game itself is going to be a massive pile of shit, if they can’t promote based on gameplay. Digital vampire tits. Gimme a break.

Sexual cheese aside, I might as well bring up something else BloodRayne-related, that’s equally as stupid: Video Mods. This is a new show premiering on MTV2 that will feature video game characters lip-syncing to pop songs. Now, we’ve all found the River City Ransom version of “Harder Better Faster Stronger” rather amusing, but we really don’t need a fulltime show dedicated to this. Plus, you know damn well it’ll be nothing but lame commercial plugs for the usual boring mass-market games, accompanied by the absolute worst music. Case in point: BloodRayne and pals will be lip-syncing to Evanescence’s “Everybody’s Fool.” Singer Amy Lee’s talent is completely wasted with that clichÃÆ’©d nu-metal pop trash. I don’t think infusing a digital dhampir chick into a video is going to improve the song any. What’s next? Mario rapping to Eminem?

I’m all for video games getting some positive mainstream coverage, but this is f*cking preposterous.